Irrespective of how much I hold on to it, my innocence in heart pounds back. I had decided I will never be in touch with my sister again, but as the luck would have it, I am missing her again.
I will always be grateful to my friend Pranjal who duped me into taking a visit to my sister's home. Though I was very tired physically, I did take the plunge. Since he is around, I knew I was safe from receiving a brunt of emotions from her. But as the time unfolded with her, I realized how much she has changed.
Right from managing the job to cooking, washing, doing the household chores to taking care of finances, she does it all. And obviously not to forget the mummy daddy part that I have given up completely, that also she is managing pretty fine.
I am really so proud of her. My past experience, my husband and my best friend all tell me to be careful of her, but somehow this time I feel she has really changed for good.
The mere sight of visualizing her struggling to open a bank locker along with taking an IBM test early in the morning freaks me out. I have never done such a juggling myself, it really touches me. All by herself she manages living alone, takes care of eccentric parents, and has already spent a hell lot of her money in ferrying my undecided and uncaring mother from my irresponsible and good for nothing father to her place. I so pity her right now.
I have to admit this, I can go head-on in accomplishing any difficult and challenging task, but the one involving my family, especially my parents even remotely freaks me out. That is the reason I gave up on them long back, yes I did run away from them and my so called responsibilities.
I just had no energy and willing to carry on my life with them. My life was burning itself out in the process of lighting myself to warm them up. All over my childhood to this time of my life, I was so drenched, that I needed to dry myself with the fresh air. In their cusp, no trace of freshness could seep in. I am happy I detached myself completely from them.
But a one day brush into my sister's life makes me feel guilty of the life that I am living. A stress-free life full of love is what she also deserves, but she still maintains her happy demeanour without complaining.
I so worry for her, I so pity her, I so wish to be like her, I so love her !!!
